“The Feminine without the Masculine exists as the substance of
– Adam Foley
This article is meant to be read by your soul; if it makes you feel uncomfortable, that’s probably a good sign.
What would you do if fear didn’t exist? For me, that’s one of the most profound and revealing questions that
My past professional life. Yes. That’s what I call it now. It’s in the past, and I don’t live there anymore, but back then, as probably many of you who are reading this, I was convinced that I needed to build an impressive career, have a name, climb the corporate ladder, make as much money as I could and prove my worth as a woman in the workplace. Little did I know how burnout, a divorce, and a pandemic would change my life for good.
After a complete breakdown and living through the most difficult financial circumstances in my adult life, I was put in a situation where after not having anything else to lose, I could choose how I really wanted to live. My ego was beaten close to death until I finally realized I didn’t want my past life anymore; I started believing that there was a way to connect with people who wanted to live with ease and space to connect and contemplate; I understood that this reality was all made up and that it was possible to create financial abundance from a place of love, compassion and genuine interest in helping others get the same; I put my intention out there for the universe to catch it, and that’s exactly when the magic happened.
Anyone living a typical professional life knows how stressful it is to have ambitions, to put yourself out there and show everyone how valuable you are, and how much you can contribute to making more money for your employer. You have to be tough, a leader, someone who is willing to sacrifice your own physical and mental health in the name of being a successful professional; you wake up every morning wishing to have more time to rest, to do things that fulfill your soul, dreaming about the next holiday or vacation, longing for the time and space to release all the tension and feel something different than stress…and that’s when you realize the price of that definition of success could be too high.
Most of us live wearing a mask (or many masks depending on the environments we need to interact with), and that’s exhausting; it consumes your essence and it keeps you on an ego-centered loop. This is how we learned it was supposed to be. This is fine; it’s part of the journey, until you make the conscious decision to love yourself more than you love the image you created for the rest of the world.
So, going back to survival. Our masks are our first line of defense to help us believe that we can be what we told the world we wanted to be, to fulfill the expectation that we created when we decided we wanted to have a profession and a successful career, and that’s how we end up living one-third of our lives doing whatever it takes to be and look and behave in a professional way putting in second place our mental health, our relationships, and our essence. It’s like if that wall we put between our true selves and others is our greatest contribution to society, what we don’t realize is that by doing that, whatever we create then comes from separation. When we are not capable of opening up and putting everything on the table with an open heart, the energy of our creations will have an echo. And it will be felt. We will experience life as “Things don’t go the way I want.”
I’m living a new stage in my life, and Growmotely has made this possible. Last year around this time, I saw an ad for Growmotely on Facebook; I clicked on it, and I immediately fell in love with what the company was doing. I created a profile on the platform and applied for a job with one of the hiring companies, but somehow I knew I belonged with Growmotely, and a few months later, I landed the most amazing job there. I believe that this company was born to bring light to humanity and to help us discover that there are alternative ways – more aligned ways – to live and be human in the sphere of work…this place where so many of us spend so much of our time.
The environment, our people, our culture, and our connections are simply perfect; we are a collection of souls and personalities that were put together to help each other grow and heal, to create a safe space where we can bring it all when we are ready, knowing that there will always be someone to hold space for who is in need, where we are truly seen and heard.
Please stay with me. I’m getting there!
I’m living a transition from embodying a more masculine doer energy (for those not familiar with the terms, you can read more about it here), an energy that desperately wanted to obtain approval through achievements, to a softer, more feminine energy that creates from ease and joy, from channeling and connection with the oneness, and it’s been wild. My old concept of success and thriving had to die, and it was extremely uncomfortable. My ego has been put to the test – on many occasions; I had to learn when to shut up and allow energy to speak for me because it was more healing than a confrontation; I had to learn how to connect from the heart, giving space to wounds to feel recognized and safe to transmute, and at the same time my team is teaching me how to do it by modelling it themselves and showing up for me when I need them.
Last week I had a dream. I was in the house where I lived with my ex-husband, and I was arguing with Andreea, our Events Manager; I walked upstairs while she stayed on the first floor. She said something that triggered me, and I felt how a dark part of me popped out and flew directly to her and took her by her upper arms. It was a strong threatening energy, but she didn’t react; her expression didn’t even change; it was as if she couldn’t see it or she didn’t feel threatened at all. The energy felt so real in my body that it made me wake up, and I stayed up for about one hour or so trying to understand the meaning of the dream. The next morning I asked Andreea if she was okay, and I told her about it; I didn’t feel I had to hide it simply because it could be interpreted as something bad. I felt safe to share with her and explore the meaning of the dream because we have a beautiful connection and I knew it was going to be an expansive experience to do it. She asked me if I felt triggered by her and when I said “I don’t think so,” she explained why she was asking that, and it didn’t click with me, but I decided to sit with it and explore it on a deeper level.
A few days passed, and while working on the planning of one of our projects, suddenly everything made sense. Andreea’s main love language is acts of service, and being the beautiful being she is, she had offered to help with the project management part, which triggered me deeply because I’m an experienced project manager, and my ego made up stories of her and the team thinking I’m not capable to handle a project; it was related to my marriage because in that relationship I had to prove myself constantly on the professional side. Later that day, I shared my realization with Andreea and she kindly supported me while I processed the feelings of inadequacy and uncovered my need for recognition and approval.
Being able to relax and trust enough to bring my whole self to work is one of the best experiences I have lived. Thank you, Andreea, for your love and light. If that is not magic, I don’t know what magic is.
This is a reminder for my CEO Sarah Hawley of how wonderful it is what you are leading us to create, that your connection with the universe and your wisdom are not being wasted even when, at times, things look difficult, and you feel you are stuck. You are also responsible for the magic and the beauty happening from and within Growmotely.
Also, Theo, you are a magnificent leader; you are the fertile soil that enables us to heal and grow, you are one of the most magical beings I have known, and I’m so happy to be on this journey with you.
It takes courage to believe that it’s possible to create your own reality; it puts all the responsibility on yourself and is an uncomfortable sensation. Surrendering to the belief that a higher intelligence will take over when you are ready to jump in is terrifying because fear is there to protect you and help you survive. But again, I ask: what does that actually mean – to survive?
Special thanks to Vanessa Guapa, our Remote Work Cupid. Having the opportunity of writing this piece gave me the chance to understand and appreciate your job much better.
Here at Growmotely, we are all about Game B; we believe there are more positive and integrated ways to human. Have you heard about it? Should we go deeper into the meaning of that? Let us know in the comments or send us an email, we’ll be happy to explore it with all of you.
Written by: Adriana Mendoza (Growmotely’s Community Manager)
Dedicated to: All the Brand & Marketing team, including those who aren’t around anymore. Especially to my
P.S. If you’re in love with what we’re creating in the world, and are keen to invest in our efforts, click here to learn more about our Republic Crowdfunding Campaign. ✨